I've returned from my Grandpa's funeral humbled and a little happy. I know that must seem very weird because who thinks of being "happy" at a funeral. But yesterday I was. I felt content as we laid him to rest yesterday afternoon at the nearby Veterans Cemetery. Almost as if all the crying and sadness could conclude and be buried in the dirt along with the casket. Not that it won't come and go on it's own but it felt peaceful finally.
I know we're only burying a "vessel" as my Grandpa has long since been up in heaven, but that doesn't mean it hasn't hurt any less.
It's made me rethink a bit about my life goals, religion and family. I'm so happy to have such a close knit family. I mean I couldn't imagine trying to cope with this kind of grief alone. Grandma is doing fine, of course still sad, but I think she's pulling thru. 2 of my uncles are keeping with her till this weekend, then one of my sisters will be staying over thru the night on and off to help grandma get used to the house again. In a way I think we all feel better Grandpa has parted after a lifetime of battling diabetes, heart disease, and having only one kidney. He can finally rest and have some fun.
I can just hear him now telling us to stop making such a fuss over him. That it's embarassing him. That's Pop's for you. A quiet, steady presence always there with firm hand on your back pressing you forward.
Miss you Grandpa.